Escaping Solitude Read online

  Edmund lets out a long, slow sigh and leans his back against my chest. I wrap my arms around him as the men in bed stop kissing each other and turn to stare at us. Danys stands first, brushing away the tangled sheets to reveal his dark skin and thick, corded muscle. He is a gens de couleur libres who arrived in America a decade ago on a weatherworn Haitian vessel. In New Orleans, he could have found respectable employment on the docks, but he chose instead to feed his baser instincts and fuck for money.

  Then, there is sweet Gabriel—or Gabriela, depending on the night. I requested he play the part of a man this evening for Edmund. Where Danys is thick and stocky, Gabriel is small and thin. He plays a woman well and doesn’t even need to don a blond wig, as his hair is so long.

  Gabriel watches from the bed, smiling, as Danys approaches and studies my sailor. “Ki jan bèl,” he says.

  “Sorry?” Edmund asks.

  Danys’s dark eyes crinkle when he smiles. “How handsome.” He runs his thumb over Edmund’s bottom lip. “Gabriel, bring some rum.”

  I’ve always had an affinity not only for Danys’s island accent but also for his bossiness in bed. True, I generally enjoy being the boss—especially with Edmund—but it can be nice to let someone else take control occasionally.

  Edmund chuckles and leans his head back against my shoulder, running his hands over mine. I accept his silent command and kiss his neck.

  Of course, Gabriel is naked as he walks over with a bottle. He gives it to Edmund who takes a long gulp before passing the bottle back. “Regardez.” He runs a hand through my sailor’s dark curls. “I think I’ll call you mon chat noir.”

  Danys laughs—a deep vibrating noise—probably because, if anyone in the room is a “black cat,” it’s him.

  “Would you give us a moment, gentlemen?” Edmund asks, and although their eyes linger, Danys and Gabriel do give us some space as they pass the bottle of rum back and forth. Edmund turns to face me. One of his eyebrows lifts, and his lips press together.

  “What’s the matter?”

  “You won’t hurt them,” he says.

  “God, no.”

  He chews his bottom lip.

  “Edmund?”

  “You once said you would murder any man who ever touched me.”

  Ah, yes. That. I do vaguely recall some such statement tumbling from my lips in a moment of passion on the island. I also, however, remember the thought of my sailor with another man making me incredibly hard. Despite these two opposing feelings, such inklings could exist side by side, so I placate Edmund with my conclusion: “I would murder any man who touched you without me watching. And no other vampire than me—ever.”

  He smiles, but his amusement does little to hide his blush. “So as long as I put on a show, you don’t care?”

  I kiss him once. “As long as I’m the encore.”

  “I fear there might not be much of me left after these two.”

  I lick into his mouth, and he moans. “There’s always more of you left.” I shove him in the chest, and he takes two stumbling steps backward before Danys rushes forward to catch him. As soon as Edmund is in his arms, Danys attacks his ear with his mouth. Edmund leans back into his embrace as Gabriel unbuttons his waistcoat, and soon, Edmund’s new suit is strewn across the room.

  In bed, he’s as pale as Gabriel with muscles more akin to Danys. I’m happy to see the last of my sailor’s bruises from the shipwreck have finally begun to fade. They are nothing but light yellow galaxies on his back and ribs.

  The whores’ lips are everywhere. Gabriel licks at Edmund’s nipples as Danys swallows his cock. Edmund clutches to sheet and hair—anything he can grab—and makes the pleasure-pain noises I so adore. I pull up a chair and sip rum, watching as these so talented men take my lover apart.

  Edmund comes while panting into Gabriel’s mouth. The pleased look on Gabriel’s face makes me think the sound of his shouts tastes sweet. Danys kisses his way up Edmund’s body, making Edmund jump when he bites at the straining tendons of his neck. Danys covers Edmund’s mouth with his, kissing roughly as he grinds his own engorged flesh against Edmund’s hip.

  I’ve requested they show no mercy.

  With Edmund still floating in a postorgasmic haze, Danys rolls him onto his side. Gabriel kisses him in that sweet way he does, but he also guides Edmund’s hand to his prick. Half alert, Edmund moves his hand up and down Gabriel’s cock until he has Gabriel whispering quiet pleas in French.

  Behind him, Danys reaches for a small bowl on the side table and coats his fingers in oil. He bites at Edmund’s shoulders as his fingers caress his hip and then move lower. I do wish the candlelight was a bit brighter for this, but I recognize the noise Edmund makes when Danys’s fingers press inside him. It’s the noise he made when I pinned him to our bed on the island and fucked him with my fingers until I thought he might sob.

  “Oh…God…” Edmund groans, eyes squeezed shut.

  Danys sucks on Edmund’s ear and whispers, “Dous mwen.” My sweet.

  Gabriel and Danys move together on the bed as if they’ve done this before—probably have, although not with me. They shift and turn until Edmund is on his stomach, panting into the pillowcase. Gabriel pushes his hair out of the way and kisses his forehead while Danys takes him from behind.

  At first, Edmund gasps. His hands claw at fabric until Danys wraps his arms around him. Then, Edmund sighs. He accepts kisses from Gabriel that leave his lips wet. When Danys pulls him up onto his knees, Edmund rests on his elbow and finally looks at me. His light eyes are dazed, glowing, as he accepts every thrust Danys offers.

  Gabriel, such a slight thing, makes his way below them both. Edmund runs his hands through Gabriel’s long, blond hair and kisses him before taking hold of the whore’s cock. Oil from Danys must have tumbled between them, because Edmund’s hand shines in the light as it moves.

  The three of them build a wave of motion. I rest my hand over my own desperate cock as I watch the man I love being fucked as he pleasures another. Both Danys and Gabriel seem lost in Edmund. Their eyes are shut tight as their hands and mouths wander over him. One might think him a sorcerer, the way his skin so enthralls.

  Danys leans forward and speaks against the back of Edmund’s neck. “Me after you, dous mwen.”

  Edmund smiles at this, but his mouth drops open when Danys wraps his fist around his already spent member. Of course, Edmund is hard again already. His youth is insatiable.

  Gabriel comes first, clutching to Edmund’s shoulders. Perhaps the lovely sight of that pretty blond pushes Edmund over, because he joins soon after, followed by Danys who groans, long and deep, before crushing both Edmund and Gabriel below him.

  They are a candlelit pile of sweet-smelling, sweat-soaked skin. When Danys and Gabriel immediately start rubbing on Edmund like hungry cats, he turns to me and grins.

  WE HAVE TO send for more candles—and rum—before they’ve finally finished, the three of them jumbled together side by side in bed. Danys is glued to Edmund’s back. He kisses Edmund’s shoulders as Edmund and Gabriel brush noses and tongues.

  My Edmund took Gabriel earlier. It wasn’t like Danys’s powerful thrusts from behind. No, Edmund took Gabriel face-to-face, hands roaming, eyes wandering, gently. It had never occurred to me that Edmund might enjoy sex both ways, not as if I would offer. I will always be the one climbing on top in our relationship, but it was still beautiful to watch—two pretty things fucking.

  “Let us keep him, Andrew,” Gabriel begs.

  Danys hums his agreement against Edmund’s spine.

  I sigh and stand, sore from the waist down. I’ve gone from hard to harder to soft and back again a dozen times. “I think not.”

  Gabriel pouts. Edmund, smiling, kisses him on the chin.

  “Sadly, it’s time for the two of you to give us some privacy, although I must say you were worth every penny.”

  Danys sits up and stretches his neck from side to side. “Let us stay and watch?”

  Edmund chu
ckles as he rolls onto his back. He’s covered in love bites.

  “No.” I gesture to the door. “Come on. Out.”

  Gabriel gives Edmund one last lingering kiss before he stands. “Mon chat noir.”

  “I should probably learn French,” Edmund says.

  The lovely whores whisper their goodbyes to us both as they wrap themselves in robes and leave the ever-darkening room. We could again do with more candles, but I suppose my eyes have already seen. Now, it’s time to feel.

  I lie beside my love and run my hand over his abdomen.

  He smiles at me. “Thank you. That was…” He whimpers as though that one delicate sound sums up a night of endless pleasure.

  “Yes. It was.”

  He wraps one leg over mine and rubs his naked body against my clothes. “Take these off.”

  I do as he requests and climb back into bed with him. The entire room smells of sex and sweet smoke from the bar downstairs. When he kisses me, I taste the other men. I lick the flavor from his mouth before moving to his neck. I spot a particularly dark bite—I watched Danys apply it hours before—and suck hard. Edmund gasps. His immediate response is to push me away, escape the pain, but then he shudders and draws me closer.

  “Was that all right?” he pants. “What we did…was it…?”

  I shush him. “It was beautiful. You’re beautiful. But remember: you will never come here without me.”

  His eyes are shut. He’s about to fall asleep, but he still has the energy to smile. “It wouldn’t be half as fun without you watching.”

  I roll him onto his stomach.

  He mutters a questioning, “Andrew? I don’t think—”

  “I won’t.” Even my insatiable Edmund can’t take any more. I reach out for what’s left of the oil and coat my neglected member. I thrust between the cheeks of his muscular ass and come in less than a minute. He sighs below me as my dead seed coats his back. I lean forward, hungry, ready to feed on this beguiling creature below me. My fangs distend to the tune of his lazy heartbeat and all I can think is “Kill…kill…kill.”

  I draw back with such vehemence, I almost tumble from the bed. I cover my mouth with my hand and stare at his familiar back, marred by an electric eel. This is not some nameless whore; this is Edmund, the man I love…and I almost just killed him.

  Jesus, when did I last eat? Our final night on the island? But that was ages ago. True, I can go long periods of time without eating, but not after the temptation of today, surrounded by so much human flesh. The dark creature I’ve kept away from Edmund’s throat has returned.

  I must feed.

  THANKS TO MY long-standing loyalty to May, she allows me to buy Danys until morning. He promises to sleep beside Edmund until I return—and, frankly, protect him. Under normal circumstances, Edmund can protect himself. However, he’s been fucked into next year and was snoring when I left. I don’t dare leave my exhausted lover alone in a dangerous brothel, but no sane person would attack Danys. I hear he once killed a man with a broken champagne bottle.

  Although the night is black, the streets outside still ring with shouts and the muffled sound of back-alley trysts. The alleys of my New Orleans have always been sanctuary to a man like me: a sodomite and murderer. I’m indeed starving. I let it get bad this time, desperate. I’m out of practice, accustomed to nothing but lizards and small birds for four whole years. Now, surrounded by the lush aroma of humanity, I’ve allowed myself to become a danger to the thing I care for most. I must be more cautious—for Edmund.

  Most street corners are empty or occupied by half-conscious, mumbling drunks, and although I consider the ease of an inebriated attack, I keep moving. The gas lamps flicker as I pass, but no one pays me any mind, except…

  There are a few young men up ahead, hidden in shadow. They talk and laugh among themselves, and I hear the click of coin. As I approach, they freeze. Their darting eyes take in the sight of me—an imposingly large figure with blond hair and a new suit.

  “Bonsoir.” I smile without showing my fangs.

  “Monsieur.” A tall, skinny boy steps forward in greeting, but he’s not the one I want. I want the boy in the back with the shy eyes and black hair. I point and gesture him forward. He ducks his head and takes my hand before pulling me away from his friends and into the dark.

  Away from the street, I press him against a wall and nose up his neck. He reeks like the grabbing hands of other men. His fingers gently brush down the front of my suit, but he makes no move to seduce me. He stands, shoulders tense, as I continue to breathe him in.

  I’m reminded of Edmund—or what I expected of Edmund—when we first met. I thought my advances would disgust him. I thought he would be shy, scared even. How wrong I had been the day Edmund instead seduced me. I grow hard just thinking about the first moment he touched me. I must make a noise, because the boy in the alley nods against my shoulder.

  “Do you want to kiss me, sir?” he asks.

  His mouth is too small. His mouth isn’t…

  Edmund.

  God, what’s happening to me? I rub my hand over my face.

  “Sir?”

  Now, I’m back in that alley from four years ago. I’m back in the moment when I killed that other prostitute just to taste his sweet soul. I used to love killing things.

  “Are you all right, sir?”

  “No, I…” I stare into his wide, nervous eyes. It would be so easy to just lean down and take a bite. I wouldn’t have to kill him, just drink until he passed out. Simple. So why aren’t my fangs cooperating? Why am I not hungry anymore? I press a silver coin into his palm. “Thank you.”

  In the darkness, his face twists into dark shadow. “That’s all, sir?”

  “Yes. Thank you. Be on your way.”

  The young streetwalker takes off with his coin. I’m sure they’ll have a good laugh at the beast of a man who couldn’t do the deed. I don’t have time to care. I hurry back up Gallatin Street, down the familiar alley, and let myself in through the red door. The bar is still crowded with people, so I merely wave to May as I pass.

  I take the steps three at a time and don’t knock before entering the room. There’s only one candle lit, but the dancing light is enough to show Danys in bed, leaned up as if ready to attack the interloper. He relaxes when he sees it is I. Edmund doesn’t move at all. I climb into bed behind him and lift him onto my chest, my nose in his hair.

  “Mm…Andrew…” he mutters but does not wake.

  Danys reaches out and squeezes my forearm. “You love him?”

  I nod. “Sometimes it feels like too much.”

  Chapter Three

  HIS HAND GRABS for my thigh when the carriage hits a violent bump. He smiles up at me and sighs. “What am I to expect?”

  “I’m not sure what you mean.”

  “Well, am I to be paraded around your coven like some rich society girl?”

  “Well. Not like a girl.” I try not to stare at him, but what’s the harm? He is mine, after all, and he’s wearing one of the perfectly fitted suits we picked up from Peters that afternoon. The red silk vest is stunning, as Edmund foresaw. He’s just shaved. Odd that he shaves every day. I wonder if he did so all those years sailing or if this is Edmund on land, different from the sailor and more the London socialite he was before he left it all behind.

  “Are you being daft on purpose?”

  I smile and fold his hand in mine.

  “My mother used to parade me around at all her parties in an effort to find me a wife.” He says the word with such revulsion, I laugh. “Can you even imagine me at a high society soiree? It’s no wonder everyone thought me mad. You’re not supposed to say what you’re really thinking at those things, you know, but God, I always did. It became an amusement. I was so damn bored once, I seduced a baron and sucked him off in his own washroom. He chased me around the rest of the season hoping for a repeat performance.”

  I laugh so hard, I snort, which makes Edmund look at me and grin.

  “I�
�m serious, Andrew, how do you want me to behave?”

  I don’t want him to behave at all, but I’ve been careful with him today. My stomach aches with emptiness, so sexual congress would be more dangerous than fun.

  He taps the top hat between us—mine. Just as Edmund doesn’t wear cravats, he doesn’t wear hats, I suspect to not ruin his hair. I also suspect my sailor is incredibly vain. From the everyday shaving to the way he instructed Peters to “take it in a bit more around the hips” to the way he oils his black curls, Edmund knows he is handsome, and he exploits those good looks. I’ll have to keep him close at my coven, pretty thing.

  I watch the streets of New Orleans pass outside. “Just be you, my love.”

  “Dangerous advice.” He leans over and sucks my earlobe.

  My fangs throb.

  The carriage stops on the edge of the French Quarter, away from the murderers and thieves. Actually, standing in front of a grand mansion that houses a vampire coven, perhaps that assessment is inaccurate. There are murderers aplenty.

  I pay the driver as Edmund steps out onto the road. When I turn around, I find him standing there, grinning up at the façade. The manse is indeed impressive, especially since I haven’t seen it in years. It’s three stories with a huge, wraparound porch. White Doric columns seem to support the whole thing, and candles burn in every window.

  “Does God live here?” he asks.

  I put my hand on his shoulder and guide him down the flower-lined front path. He pauses to study a huge crimson blossom.

  Compared to Edmund, I think the rest of us see the world in black and white.

  A human servant opens the door and bows when we enter. From the grand front foyer, I already hear the sound of a string quartet. The echo is ghostly, floating around the high ceilings. Enormous pieces of art hang from every wall, and the floor is freshly waxed. I smell crawfish and butter—food to keep our human guests strong throughout the night of revelry. Edmund falls into step at my side as we walk farther inside, down the hall and toward the lamp-lit back garden. However, the lush greenery doesn’t bring comfort; it only reminds me of my island exile. Edmund grabs my hand as if he understands, and then…well, I’m not sure what happens.